Dear Michael

Dear Michael,
It's Fathers Day, sadly not a happy one. Without our James here with us, our arms are empty, but you are still a Father.

You became a Father on November 4th 2017, the day we took the pregnancy test. You'd reluctantly gone to the pharmacy, as I'd been feeling sick for 10 days, you thought I was just being a hypochondriac and psychosomatically wishing I had morning sickness, but those two pink lines proved us wrong.

For weeks afterwards, I would catch you grinning to yourself, or I'd see you looking at other Fathers and their children and occasionally suggesting baby names whilst reading ending credits of a TV show.

James' pregnancy was difficult, from the medical detox to the severe sickness and the pain. You would work a 10 hour day, come home, cook, clean and then work on your art projects, whilst I took to the sofa - scared to move. You were a star and never complained.

When we went to scans, you would involuntarily grab my hand and we'd grin like fools, I could physically see you falling in love with James. As my tummy grew and my symptoms subsided we started to plan the nursery, we bought a Moses basket, discussed breast pumps and researched birthing plans, none of it phased you, I knew you were more than ready to be a Daddy.

On the fateful day we found out we would lose James, as our hearts broke in unison, I knew in that moment how much you loved both James and I, by how much pain you were in.

When James was born, I was highly medicated but the memory of you holding our boy, stroking his face, tears streaming down yours whilst your Dad, James' Grandad, rested a supportive hand on your shoulder - will stay with me forever.

The process of losing James took its toll on us, but only strengthened our relationship, you became more open, emotional and honest, after 12 years together I didn't think I could know you any better, but you becoming a Father just made me more proud and in awe of you.

In the 2 and half months since James was born, you've had to go back to work, but it hasn't stopped you caring for me. When you arrive home and I've barely managed to do more than shower and cry, you don't tut or become annoyed, you always ask "What can I do?" and sit and hold me as I sob... and that's all I need. You do this all whilst grieving yourself, you've been so strong. I cannot thank you enough.

One day, you will be a Father of a living baby, he or she will never replace our first born, but losing him as made me realised, now more than ever, how much I want children with you. If we can come out of all this heartache, stronger and more solid, then I think anything else life throws at us will be a doddle and I'm so glad it's you by my side.

So have this Fathers day with your own Father, yes it will be sad, yes there will be someone missing but let's hope that by next Fathers day it will be a happy nappy filled one.

I love you
L xxx

Baby Show Ticket Giveaway

On March 2nd-4th The Baby Show, with MadeforMums is being held at the London Excel Centre. Mike and I have been invited to go along, now that we're parents to be! An incredible shopping experience, The Baby Show offers the biggest and best brands for parents, bumps and new babies - we can't wait!

Given that I'll be a disabled Mum with some difficulties and limitations, I personally cannot wait to meet all the exhibitors to try and test their products, anything that will help make me a better, more capable mother. Plus by the time of the show, we'll know whether we'll be buying pink or blue!

From Baby Bjorn, Chicco, Joolz, MAM, Tommee Tippee, Mothercare, Babiesrus and many many more The Baby Show really is the place to go for all your baby needs!

I have two full-priced adult tickets to give away! See below for your many chances to win!

Baby Show Ticket Giveaway

Good Luck!

L x

Afternoon Tea at The Royal Hotel

On October 14th, I was invited to a Bloggers afternoon tea at the Royal Hotel in Southend (very handy since I live 10 minutes away!). I'm not sure you're meant to admit this but it was my very first blogger's event - and what a way to start!

In my twenties (read: drinking days) I avoided the Royal Hotel, it was an unsavoury drinking hole that had a lousy reputation. I always thought it was such a shame as it's an iconic 200+-year-old Southend landmark.

The Beautiful Royal Hotel *Although no 

longer a hotel*

Fast-forward to 2015, when brothers Matthew and David along with their father Terry renovated and saved the building from wreck and ruin, into a glorious restaurant and bar - something Southenders could be proud of.

Upon arrival, we were presented with a glass of non-alcoholic Prosecco called the Bee's Knees which was refreshing and tasty, perfect for baby showers and younger customers who want to feel grown up.

Director/Owner Matthew came to greet us and escorted me to the first-floor ballroom. Unfortunately, the venue isn't wheelchair accessible as it's a Grand II listed building, but all the staff were extremely helpful and supportive in getting myself and my chair around so that I didn't miss out.

The ballroom was exquisite, with the original 1791 floor, ornate coving and chandeliers. Standing in such a grand hall you can imagine how it was THE place to party and dine. Former guests of the Royal Hotel include Princess Caroline, wife of George IV and Lady Hamilton held a final ball for her lover Admiral Horatio Nelson in 1805, just a few months before the Battle of Trafalgar and now Lynsey Garrick lol!

The Royal Ballroom

Afternoon Tea was an absolute treat, we were lucky to sample the Royal Hotel Afternoon tea with delicate sandwiches, a selection of beautiful cakes, macaroons and scones with Tiptree jam. Plus we tried the Gentleman's Royal tea which featured chunky sandwiches, burgers, sausages, cheeses, olives and crackers.

 

The Royal Afternoon Tea and The Gentleman's Tea

Although both were delicious,  I personally preferred the Gentleman's selection which you can also add a Dalimore Whisky tray, sampling various aged products. With both booking's you can have tea, coffee or for a special event, prosecco.

After tea, The Royal Hotel staff hand more treats in store for us. We were escorted by Matthew, whose background is in event organising for venues such as the Tower of London and the Natural History Museum, to meet his brother David a trained flare barman who was head Bar Trainer at the London Cocktail Club.

 

Dr Legba's Emporium and Menu

Tucked away in the venue basement, is the wonderful Dr Legba's Emporium, an Emerald Green tavern, carefully lit, with a reclaimed wooden bar, covered in 2p's (over £170 worth!), quirky lamps and artwork, in addition to intimate tables and seating nooks perfect for a date night or a small celebratory event.

David expertly made us a selection of Royal Hotel cocktails. The menus are regularly rotated and the team are continually testing and trialling new and exclusive recipes.

Every drink was completely out of this world, I could easily spend a whole day trying them all. Each cocktail was distinctive playing on the origin recipes. For example, in David's Espresso Martini he adds salted caramel syrup adding a warming twist to this classic. 

Espresso Martini

I fell in love with the eccentric Absinth fountain, with its four funnels drip pouring the potent liquor into sugar cubes, for a heady aniseed cocktail. The piece de resistance of the afternoon was the "Pork and Apple" a blend of Sour apple liqueur, Absolut vodka, pressed apple juice, fresh lime all stirred with a slice of absinthe caramelised bacon, which is set alight - this cocktail was so scrumptious and the sweet, salty, smoky bacon was a distinctive little treat!

 

Absithe Fountain and The Pork and Apple cocktail

Matthew and David were wonderful hosts, the hotel staff were friendly and sweet, all the food and drinks were knowledgeably handpicked for an elite experience but without customers feeling out of place. The Royal Hotel is a special venue and I highly recommend it for lunches, nights out, afternoon teas or even a Sunday roast, it's a place where every meal feels like a luxurious treat.

View from The Royal Hotel

For more information and to see menu's click here!

L xxx

Rewind

There's lots to catch up on! The wedding, new jobs and wrinkle cream here is a video to catch up all up, on the goings on in the brand new Garrick Household!

If you can't see the video click here!

L xxx

Kinky Boots

I was lucky enough to go on another matinee trip into London with Martin Wood Events (Formally TAP events) and this time it was Kinky Boots The Musical.

We had an interesting journey into the capital. Because of the horror this week in Manchester, London was a hotbed for police and army activity. I was thankful for the added protection but I couldn't help feel on edge watching armed police on the streets.

I had taken the trip with my lovely friend Lauren since our journey had been a long and slow one, we had a quick hour in Zizzi's for lunch and a skinny Prosecco (yes that is a real thing!).

Founded in 1806, Kinky Boots is held at the Adelphi Theatre (which is completely accessible with very helpful and attentive staff), which was beautiful with stunning 1930's art deco decor. The show is based on the 2005 film starring Chiwetel Ejiofor and is about a failing shoe factory in Northampton, which, after a chance encounter with a drag queen, has a second chance which is ultimately based on a true story!

The factory owner, clueless and lost Charlie Price was played by understudy Paul Ayre, an endearing character portrayal that carried the quieter chunks of the show with some sweet solo's and real heart but as soon as wonderful Drag Queen Lola, played by Matt Henry (of The Voice fame), enters the stage, all eyes were on her. With a quick wit, sharp moves and legs to die for, Henry is a joy to watch driving the lively and colourful numbers with style.

The whole show was supported by a brilliant, lively cast and ensemble - high energy and humour in spades and I have to mention Elena Skye who played Lauren, this is Skye's debut in the West End and she was hilarious, like a cheeky Northern Amy Poehler.

The show's score was written by the incomparable Cyndi Lauper and you can hear her influence in all the songs, astute lyrics, playful beats and the ability to draw emotion and connection in her words. My personal favourites were "Sex is in the Heel", "What a woman wants" and "Raise Up/Just Be".

Kinky Boots The Musical is just fabulous, a heartwarming, jovial and unique show that you leave with a huge smile on your face, I will be back to see the show as soon as I can and I'm off to purchase the soundtrack now!




Until next Wednesday!
L xxx

**********************************
In case you missed last weeks vlog click here or wach the video below

Head in the Sand

As a woman in my 30's, who completed her schooling, college and got accepted into University (albeit the fact I didn't go due to health!) I consider myself to be a fairly intelligent person with a healthy dose of common sense to boot, but I have a somewhat childish habit.

I ignore the news. My head is firmly in the sand, my fingers are in my ears whilst I sing whatever current song I have merry-go-rounding in my head at the time.

I used to want to be clued up and ready for any current affairs conversation, but these days I just don't want to know. When I confessed this in a forum, I was berated for being sheltered and nieve, that maybe the case, but don't you ever feel there is so much going on, the majority of it truly awful, that you simply don't want to fill your head with all the terror and sadness?

Don't get me wrong, I know the basics; I know Donald Trump is proving himself to be the idiot we all knew he would be, and that this has caused issues with the rest of the world, namely Russia. I know that the UK election is looming, and I also have no idea who I'll vote for this time. But I just cannot bare to be bombarded constantly with negative and sensationalised events and people.

Does this make me uninformed and stupid? I don't think so. When I say I ignore the news, I ignore it as best I can, but I'm a prolific social media user and big stories are unavoidable in retweets and shares, so I'm aware when something truly awful has happened, like the Westminster terror attack in London earlier this year, but once I know the general story I don't want to keep going over it.

I'm an emotional girl, NSPCC commercials and every single birth on One Born Every Minute leave me in floods of tears, I take on a lot to heart and I can not/don't want to fill my brain with all the ugly in the world. I already struggle with the thought that I'll be bringing my children into a cruel and confusing world, but I chose to concentrate on the good, the hopeful and the happy and if that does mean I'm sheltered and nieve then so be it.

Fashion Faux Pas

A few years back, I wrote a piece for my local newspaper, The Evening Echo, about the pitfalls of beauty and fashion when you're disabled. After a day in Lakeside today, I've found some more issues I thought I'd share with you.

Fear of the lost ring - I've lost 20+lb's on Slimming world and my engagement ring has become dangerously loose! Due to Cerebral Palsy on my left side, I can't feel my hand, so if I lost my ring, or a bracelet I wouldn't know unless I purposely checked - the horror! So now whilst pushing myself around New Look, Mike looks after the ring.

Boredom - I texted my wedding make-up artist, Faye, to ask advice on good skin care yesterday, I'm very slack when it comes to beauty products and daily rituals. Today's shopping trip reminded me of a conversation I'd had with Faye about what makeup and hair I wanted for the wedding. I became irrationally excited during this conversation as I struggle to do hair and makeup in day to day life, with one fully functioning hand. My hair is either in a ponytail or poker straight and I wear the same 5 makeup products every.single.day. So having the luxury of a hair and makeup artist for the wedding day is a real treat!

Lusting for footwear - I've mentioned my croissant shaped foot, countless times on this blog and vlog, as well as causing horrendous pain, my bloomin' foot also mean's I cannot wear beautiful shoes. I spent today drooling over heels, pumps and wedges but this is probably great for my back account because if I could wear shoes there would be an entire room in the house dedicated to them!

Wheelchair Faux Pas - When I ordered my wheelchair, 5 years ago, I requested it to be the colour of Cadbury's purple - it arrived pink! But whether it's pink or purple, it just doesn't go with all my outfits! Next time I'll order a sleek black chair - black goes with everything!

Until Next Wednesday!
L xxx

In case you didn't see last week's vlog see the video below, if you can't see a video click here.

Attack of the Bridezilla

After last week's announcement, that we had booked our wedding, we've had an overall wonderful response and have managed to book the majority of the companies/people we need for the day. I just have to find a makeup/hair artist and transport, plus even the hen do preparations have started - and who knew that would be more complicated that the wedding day itself lol!

After years of being a bridesmaid or guest at 3 dozen weddings, I've taken note from all the couples; the do's and don'ts of the day according to those who's been there, done it and come out thousands of pounds lighter the other side.

Much to our surprise, luck and gratitude, the wedding planning has come along beautifully and easily. I'm very much expecting something to have gone wrong or that I've forgotten something crucial, yet I have still found myself getting in a bit of a huff, the Bridezilla in me, rearing its ugly head.

Bridezilla gonna get ya!

Why are there no nice brown invite envelopes on Amazon Prime? Why did I eat that cake/prosecco/chocolate when I know full well that I have a wedding dress to squeeze into by July? Why don't I know what the weather will be like on the day? Is it crass and cheeky to ask for cash as a wedding gift? These are all very much, 1st world problems and mostly ridiculous thoughts but they've still kept me up at night, I don't sleep enough as it is!

Stupid brain, I didn't think I'd be so twitchy about the whole thing, I am someone who would have happily never married Mike, skipped that step and got straight onto having babies, but now it's happening, I want it to be a great day that people enjoy. I want them to be well fed, dance until they drop and drink lots so I'm not they only numpty throwing ridiculous moves on the dance floor; why oh why can't I control all my guests' free will and emotions damn it!

I am well aware that I sound like a self-indulgent brat, but I'm giddy with excitement. Over the years I've seen countless social media posts about other weddings; Brides panicking, Meme's telling brides to shut the hell up, so I've tried not to bang on about the wedding too much in person either.

I don't want to be "that friend", the one who manages to bring every conversation back to the wedding day, the one who complains when she can't find the right envelopes, the one who preaches at other brides to be about what they should or shouldn't be doing!

What a minefield weddings are! I'm enjoying the process more than I was at the beginning, despite the idiot thoughts running around my tiny brain. So I now pledge, in hopes that I don't drive my readers mental too, to limit myself to only one wedding vlog or blog a month.

So, now I've got to find 15 non-wedding related subjects between now at the day.... damn it again!
L xxx

In case you didn't see last weeks vlog watch below. If you can't see the video click here and please subscribe!

Tapping to Wicked

I’m sorry I’m a day late! To be honest, Monday and Tuesday were pretty much written off with pain and sleep, and yesterday (Wednesday i.e. blog day!) my sister, Nicola, and I went to see the West End show Wicked and by the time we got home, I was in enough pain to warrant a dinner and bed!

Wicked!

Wicked, the hit West End/Broadway show is mesmerising and about to go on a tour. The storyline hones in on the unlikely friendship between the infamous Wicked Witch of the West, Elphaba, and Glinda the Good from the epic Wizard of OZ books/films. 

Speaking of unlikely friendships, our trip to see the show largely came from my own one. You see our day out was planned by TAP Events who organise matinee outings to big shows in London. TAP is owned and run by Martin and Karen.

I've known Karen for 16 years, and the reason our friendship is an unusual one, is that Karen is my ex-boyfriends Mum. My ex and I split up 12 years ago and yet Karen and I remained friends. Some think it's a tad odd but Karen is one of my closest friends who I love, respect and enjoy spending time with, however unlikely our friendship is!

Anyway...

Getting to London is a sore subject with me. I adore our capital and city of my birth, but getting around in a wheelchair is difficult in such a historic and busy place. The excellent thing about Tap Events is that being a Southend local company, they collect patrons at pick up points all around town and they're happy to take wheelchairs! 

I was treating my sister to the show, as her Birthday present, as I've seen the show before. The coach dropped us right outside the theatre but we had a couple of hours to explore, get lunch and shop. 

At 2:30, we were greeted at the theatre doors by Kara, Victoria Apollo's, assistances coordinator, who explained where we were seated, where the disabled loo's were, and then took us in via platform lifts to our dress circle seats, where we had an amazing view of the whole stage.

The show is no less incredible than the first time I saw it. In fact, Wicked get better each time, I think I was so enthralled the first time that I didn't fully take it in. The music, the voices, the costumes and set design were all mesmerising, I adore the way Wicked plot weaves effortlessly into the well known OZ tales and I found myself getting a tad emotional in parts because it is such a beautiful, emotive funny show. 

Luckily, since this was Nicola's Birthday gift, she loved the show, which by the way was her first foray into the West End, and said that she has caught the theatre bug. When I asked her what she thought of the show she simply said Wicked... what more can you say?

Nicola and I

After the show, the lovely Kara came and escorted us through the theatre back outside into the chilly February night, where our coach was waiting for us and although by this point I was exhausted and in agony,  we were both on the wonderful high show's like Wicked put you on. 

A huge thanks to Martin and Karen at Tap Events, I cannot recommend their service enough, they look after you every step of the trip, competitive prices for the shows are standard and you don't have to faff around on the trains and tubes. You do have to be able to take a few steps on and off the coach but every one helps to you and let you take your time (and boy do I take my time). I'll be using their services a lot in the future.

Go see Wicked!

Until next Wednesday,
L xxx

The Dreaded Brown Envelope

It’s been a weird week, the countdown began for Mike's homecoming, three weeks is the longest we've been apart since May last year, his actual job seems to be picking up again, so have to get used to being home alone a lot more... we so need a guinea pig or puppy to keep me company Mike!

I was lucky enough to see the touring show of Dirty Dancing with a group of girlfriends this week; it was fabulous, a real treat they stayed close the beloved film, plus the Johnny part was playing but a Southend local guy Lewis Griffiths. I haven't been out, out in so long and a glass of bubbly helped to relax me. 

The Dreaded Brown Envelope

This week was brought down by a dreaded brown envelope hitting my doormat. If you are disabled and in receipt of Disability Living Allowance (DLA) or Employment and Support Allowance (ESA) you'll know that heart-stopping, sickening feeling when you get the distinctive brown scare bomb in the post. 

I've been called in for a review of my benefits. I understand that it's an evil necessity for the government but when you know that you are entitled, and may I add grateful, for the disability payments it's terrifying. 

It's horrible going for an hour long interview, relaying your toilet habits, telling them about the days when you can't stand long enough to cook a meal or how you sleep 4 hours a night. Yes, my conditions are SHIT, they're horrible vile illnesses, that leave me sobbing, but it's not in my nature to be a "poor me" and seek a sympathy vote, but to keep my benefits I have to be honest and instead of my default answer of "I'm fine" I need to spill the shit to a complete stranger. 

It doesn't ease my mind that I've heard so many friends and news stories; where people in genuine need have lost the benefits that provide them with their freedoms in Motability, extra equipment, taxi fairs to hospital and so much more and yet others who are just plain frauds with full-time jobs, playing golf and skiing, don't get caught - it's all very messed up. 

My appointment is next Wednesday, so in next week's vlog I'll let you know how it went. I can only be honest and hope they understand my needs and if not, I don't know what I'll do. 

Fingers crossed people!

Until Next Wednesday 

L x

If you missed last weeks vlog watch below or if you can't see it click here! 

Get a Hobby!

One of my new year's resolutions was to read a book a month, (I'm reading Billy and Me by Giovanna Fletcher this month) but a friend pointed out that reading is a hobby rather than a resolution so maybe I should have said "To maintain and learn new hobbies" instead.

The word hobby is largely associated with elderly people and a box to fill in on a dating site profile. After talking to a few friends, there is a distinct lack of people with hobbies. Granted many people have very little spare time or would rather be in front of the telly, but I can assure you a hobby can be a wonderful and fulfilling addition to your life.

My current hobbies are cooking/baking, although at the moment these are limited to Slimming World recipes, which is fun, but no giant chocolate cakes and all day cooked briskets for now!  But I'm enjoying experimenting with healthy foods. Last year I went to two cookery classes to make pork pies and macaroons and had so much fun despite being nervous I would struggle, to read my review of The Delightful Tea Bake School click here!

Proud of my Pork Pies

Blogging and vlogging are a hobby; save some of the really famous social media stars, it's not worth opening a blog or channel for money, although I have ads on both the payments are in pennies a month, but I do it for the love of writing. Being too ill (and therefore too unreliable for a full-time job) scuppered my plans to be a journalist, so this, to me, is the next best thing!

If you follow my Instagram you would have seen some unusual crafts appear on my feed. I love doing crafts with my Nieces and Nephews, so I sift through Pinterest for idea's that will entertain 2-12year olds, without destroying Nanny's kitchen! I feel I need to start making time to do crafts for myself, I made our door wreath for Christmas last year and loved it.

Crafts, not just for kids

Since I spend less and less time sleeping these days and more time at home due to the pain, I need a few more hobbies to keep my brain going, even if my body is falling apart. A few months ago I won a huge amount of wool and knitting books - I can't knit, but that's what youtube is for and I'll learn, also other people with CRPS have said it's great for those long nights alone when brain power is scarce!

So, do you have a hobby? Do you think it's a little sad to have hobbies? Or do you have some hobbies to suggest for me to try? Let me know!

Until Next Wednesday...

L xxx

P.S Here's last weeks vlog if you missed it! (If you can't see the video click here!)

Christmas Legends

Sometimes Christmas feels like a full-time job and when you're medically declared unfit for work, you understand why you've been labelled that way.

As I have mentioned countless times I adore Christmas, the music, the food, the decorations, the gatherings, time with all my loved ones, the games and the TV Christmas specials (Hello! Call the Midwife!) but it's tiring!

This week has been utterly mental, I am meeting people for all three meals of the day - Slimming World hell - but only a 1lb gain this December....so far!. There is a mental list running through my head 24/7 and the ridiculous thing is; my Father in law will be cooking Christmas day dinner, due to lack of funds, we've only bought gifts for our 4 Nieces and 2 Nephews and all the meet and greets I've been going to, have been away from our house (i.e no clean up for me!) and yet I'm still panicking and exhausted. (I'm aware of my first world problem!)

So this blog is dedicated to all the parents buying for all their kids, families, kids friends, teachers, scout and brownie leaders, bosses, workmates, Secret Santa's and Neighbours. To all the shop's co-ordinating mountains of Christmas gifts, irate customers and fatigued staff. To all the charities struggling to provide for all those in their service with a dire lack of funds - I salute you all in this beautifully insane festive period, keep going, there are only a few days left and lets face it, we'll all miss it when there are 365 days to go until the next Christmas day.

Merry Christmas readers/watchers!

Until next Wednesday!
L xxx

*******************************************************

If you didn't see it last week here is last weeks vlog (If you can't see the video, click here!)

Making a list!

It's Wednesday! It's also vlog week... so here's a video about cheering yourself up when the festive cheer is avoiding you!

Don't forget to subscribe to my youtube channel!

Until Next Wednesday!
L xxx

Giving as good as we're given!

It's December, which means I can actually talk about Christmas without being told off on Twitter!

Any long term readers will know; I'm a Christmas-acholic - it's my favourite time of year, in fact, one year, I had to wake up my small Nieces and Nephews on Christmas morning as they weren't up early up enough for my liking!

Me casually mocking my Nephew

To me, it's not just about family time, Christmas music on loop (much to Mike's dismay!), and endless supplies of mince pies and eggnog - to me Christmas is a special time of year, where people become charitable and giving, almost selfless. Yes, we should be caring all year around, but I'm just glad that most do their bit for one month of the year.

Since buying our new house, Mike hasn't really worked (due to the oil industry crashing - he is anything but lazy!) so money has been tight, tighter than ever in the 10 years we've been together - it's been hard but we've been sensible and finally my love of coupons and creative cooking has been utilised!

In the past, I've been called a charity whore, I love a good fundraiser, I always religiously watch Children in need and Red Nose day. Mike has to brace himself on both event days as our bank accounts get a beating, usually with each emotive VT they show. But this year, Mike asked if I would forgo my usual sob fest and not donate to charity this Christmas or at least tone it down - and although I was horrified, I knew he was right, but it still made me sad.

After my sulk, I did begin to wonder, how much have I given to charity over the years? It's probably best there is no tally, as I probably could have bought a new car by now, so maybe a year off isn't so selfish, but then there was a knock at the door.

My friend Chole turned up with a suitcase, not going into too much detail, she needed a bit of company and TLC and she's still with us 4 days later and although our bigger house has given us a bigger mortgage (read: Money worries) it's also given us the space to take in those in need - my own sneaky way of still giving even when things are tight and tough - screw you oil industry!

Not being one to sit still, Mike has opened up a small art company called Bored Monkey UK (we're taking orders!), he makes art carvings, graphic design work and takes commissions.

One of Mikes pieces (Click here to buy)

Thankfully our friends have shared his work and got us more commissions so that we're not desperate, some may see that as sympathetic charity from those who feel sorry for us - I see it as all the kindness I've given, over the years, coming back to help us and I couldn't be more grateful to our loved ones.

So after my shock and horror at a lean Christmas, I'm still giving and receiving so much more than a box of chocolates or Boots gift set - doesn't that make you warm and gooey inside? It does for me!

Until next Wednesday!
L x

************************

Last weeks vlog - Slimming World!

48 Hours Later!

November is Complex Regional Pain Syndrome awareness month! November 7th is the internationally recognised CRPS day and I made a vlog.

Every year on this written blog, I've tried to promote and create awareness of the condition I've had for 25 years. The condition really sucks, I'm in pain 24/7 but I wanted to create something a little different this year; the first is trying out Vlog, I hate my voice and I could think of much better things to do than spend the day watching my own face for hours but I wanted to get out of the comfort zone I currently nestle in!

Secondly, I wanted to do a piece about the positive side of dealing with a chronic pain condition and this is what I came up with...

I try to keep chipper about bad days, it's my belief that if you wallow you'll only concentrate on the pain and end up feeling worse, but then this morning....

I felt so rubbish! I've had a little burst of energy (read: coffee) but it has been a difficult day, one I wouldn't normally harp on about, especially when I look so God-awful but I think it's good to show both side of life for us with CRPS

So there you go, so now you have blogs and vlogs to look forward to, you lucky lucky people!

Until next Wednesday!
L x

Stairlift to Heaven

After ALOT of money, phone calls, e-mails, 12 weeks and a company I will NOT be recommending, I got my stairlift!

Like many other mobility and disability aids, stairlifts are seen as clinical, ugly and are associated with the elderly. I myself agree with the first two points but many of us are far from elderly and need this equipment to muddle through our daily lives. 

My stairlift joy dance!

So if you’re considering a stairlift, there is no shame or giving in and here’s a modern girls guide to 

stairlifts.

1. Do your research - We did a lot of research into brands, products, and companies associated with stairlifts and still came up a cropper with an uncaring and rude company who didn’t do what they were paid to do. If I was installing a new TV or fridge I wouldn’t have been so angry but this equipment was giving me my freedom!

2. Bags – My right hand controls the stairlift and my left hand is a tad useless, so I have cloth bags both upstairs and down. You pile in all the stuff you need to take up with you that prevents dropping everything and creating a waterfall of crap you can’t pick up, this also works with washing, before I used the bags, I had to hug the dirty clothes and no one needs Mike’s rancid socks so close to their nose!

3. Invest in a lidded coffee cup or flask – I love my morning Dulce’ Gusto skinny cappuccino but my study is upstairs, balancing a hot drink whist controlling the stairlift was fun but nobody has time for a soggy burnt lap.

Safe Coffee

4. Enjoy the ride – There is a law that the lifts cannot go any faster than 4mph and it takes almost two minutes to get upstairs (if you forget anything that’s a 5-minute round trip!) I started to get annoyed that my 2yr old Nephew Alex could overtake me but then I had a thought....

I’m notoriously stubborn. On my good days (which are getting further apart – Gee thanks British weather!) I like to get stuff done and of course, overdo it, so now I see my 2 minute ride on the world’s slowest roller coaster as a time to rest and think about what’s next!

5. Pimp your ride – Yes stairlifts are ugly as sin! You can’t do much with the rails but I plan on learning to use a sewing machine to cover the beige seat in something funky and less drab.

6. Not just for mobility – Stairlifts are, in my eyes, not just for mobility, I fully expect that friends, family or even future teenagers of my own, will get very drunk and I reckon we’ll end up sending them up on the lift to bed plus there’s a seat belt for safety!

My stairlift also has a 125kg weight limit so if Mike and I need something heavy moved upstairs I fully intend to use it to save Mike’s back.

7. Answers nature's call – An unexpected bonus to the stairlifts speed is that you'll achieve very good pelvic floor muscles, because if you’re dying for a pee, you’re not going anywhere fast, so either go before you're desperate or get very good at holding it in!

8. Lastly appreciate the technology – When I was a teenager my parents couldn’t afford a stairlift and the waiting list for a government funded one was huge, so I had to pee in a commode (emptied by my wonderful mum), have a sponge bath in the dining room (also emptied by my patient mother) which is also where I slept for several years, and having the savings to buy my own stair lift when I needed one is a true and brilliant luxury that I’m grateful for.

Until next Wednesday!

L xxx

Video Credit to my Brother Steve who remixed my stairlift video to our mutually loved soundtrack of Blink 182

We are still Great, Britain!

Well, today is Election day in the UK, it will be the closed poll results since World War 2. I personally have had a real struggle choosing who to vote for, I happen to agree with policies from most of the parties, but on the same hand disagree with them all too. 

I think we'll have another coalition government, but I've sent in my postal vote regardless and hope that whatever happens, it will be positive for our little island.

There has been so much press coverage surrounding the election, much of it had been negative and at points, hopeless. So I wanted to inject some positivity into the day and list a few great things about the UK - what we've achieved and offer to the rest of the world.

Our Queens rock!
In September of 2015 our Queen Elizabeth II will be Englands longest reigning monarch, serving 63 years and counting - Go Ma'am! Elizabeth's Great Great Grandmother Queen Victoria will take second place.

QueenElizabeth I will also made the 9th longest reigning Queen after 44 years on the throne between the three they have conquering the world, creating Empires, forging trading relationships with the rest of the world and all with decorum and dignity - girl power!

Kick ass Queens

We've changed the world with our inventions and theories!
Scotsman John Logie Baird invented the Television. In 2014 it was discovered that 96% of the UK and 96.7% of the American populations have TV sets  - you are welcome America!

Lincolnshire born Sir Isaac Newton developed the three laws of motion which form the basic principles of modern physics and of course famously developed theories on Gravity with the help of a good old English Garden apple, falling from a tree. 

Without Tim Berners-Lee, you wouldn't even be reading this, the London born Computer Scientist invented the World Wide Web and over 3 billion of us are connected online - you are very welcome World!

Our arts and acts have coloured the world!
Who could imagine a world without Harry Potter, Jane Austen and Mr Darcy, MontyPython, the Beatles, Cary Grant, The Redgrave family, John Constable and TheSpice Girls? When you think that our tiny Kingdom is the 2x smaller than the State of Texas and yet we have bought the world a lot of great talent, literature, art and music. 

Cary Grant

We can only apologise for Ali G, the movie Honest and the Cheeky girls - we're not perfect!

We love our grub
Did you know champagne was invented in England, not France? We invented the Sandwich, named after the Earl of Sandwich.... you are welcome Subway! The world's first chocolate bar was made by Londoner Joseph Fry in the 1720's - thank God for Mr Fry! Colchester oysters were one of the main reasons for the Romans invading Britain in 43AD - greedy buggers and yes of course we love our tea - 163 million cups are enjoyed here every single day!

But strangely despite us loving and being famed for our fish & chips, Pork Pies, Stilton Cheese, Haggis, Irish Stews and Welsh Cakes our national food is Chicken Tikka Massala! To be fair though, I'd eat all of the above with national pride!

Chicken Tikka Masala

As my countrymen and woman vote in their millions today, many others will not, stating "What's the point?" Well, my point is, despite our difficulties, our downfalls and mistakes of those running the United Kingdom we have a lot to be proud of. The news is full of bad reports, depressing statistics and sad states of affair but everyone getting involved and trying to mend our broken society can only lead to good things. If none of us voted we'd be in an even worse place than we are now.

So next time you read a paper or settle down for the 6 o'clock news, remind yourself of the great things Great Britain has and will continue to produce and go vote!

L xxx

Feeling like a Red Balloon

Recently, I heard a joke about a red balloon and I thought it would be the perfect analogy to why I haven't blogged for 5 months. Like an old red balloon; I've felt let down, deflated a tad more wrinkled than I did last Summer. 

I've been very conscious that I didn't want to be/ or no longer be "social media martyr". I see competitive status' like "I've only had one/two/three hours sleep" or those who use their twitter feed to give us an hourly pain update, rated 1-10.  Worst of all, those who simply change their status to "I'm so happy/angry/sad" and when asked why, they refuse to answer - why put up a post that you're not willing to elaborate on to a SOCIAL MEDIA platform?

I fess up, I have done some of the above but after watching rather than posting online, I've seen how irritating and depressing it becomes for those reading. Don't get me wrong, we all need a moan or a venting session, it's nice to know there are others in the same situation or those giving you great advice, but do we need to post one the hour of every hour?

The last 8 years of my life have been dominated by 4 court cases (which by the way, I was not the criminal in any way, but I was the one mopping up the aftermath!) including family, criminal and Will & probate cases. It might have been easier to take a law degree! I've neglected my own goals, charity work and not to mention my family and friends. If I posted every time I was in pain, stressed, panicked I would have zero friends or followers!

All the events been exhausting and a few months back I decided to have hypnotherapy, it works very well on me from previous experience, and this time it really helped. So a long story short, the hypnotherapy worked and the cure was realising that I have forgotten to be optimistic, happy and grateful.

So how do you see the positive's in trauma? Well, I have gone back to seeing the bright side; what can I learn from all the cases? In my newly refreshed brain, I see that it has all been life experience; I will make sure I correctly file my Will and last testament, I will follow my instincts rather than fobbing off my opinions. I now know who my really friends are and I've learnt who only befriended me for their own gain and my useful resources - physical, mental or material. 

If nothing else, my memoirs will be an interesting read - split into several volumes!

Bear with me guys!

L xxx

Helicopters, Sunbathing and Dolphins

If you missed the first few blogs to Australia 2014 series please use the links just below!

Australia 2014 Part 1
Australia 2014 Part 2
Australia 2014 Part 3
Australia 2014 Part 4
Australia 2014 Part 5


Monday 21^st of April was the last day of the “Holiday” part of our trip to Oz. The following 5 would be very work related so Mike and I decided to make it a really special day.

We’d booked a day trip to Morton Island to go feed Dolphins! Mike had fed and swam with dolphins in Florida and Bahamas (Lucky Sod!) so he was more excited to see my reaction to it all!

We caught an early morning ferry from Brisbane to Morton Island taking about 75 minutes. The weather was in its 30’s a perfect day for sunbathing and island life! The island is a protected one, with only one resort called Tangalooma, allowed to have been built, retaining the stunning features of the place.

We arrived to views of amazing white beaches, crystal blue waters and no crowds of tourists – paradise!

Morton Island

Although not planned, we decided to take a helicopter ride over the Island, again Mike has been in many helicopters so he was looking forward to it, although apprehensive I would be nervous in such a little aircraft.

I loved it! I wasn’t nervous in the slightest! Our pilot Michael told us about Morton Island and pointed out shipwrecks, turtles, dugongs and dolphins - it was breathtaking.  I was a complete loser and updated my status from the air which I git stick over – bothered!

Excited Much!??

Both our cameras were in full action but I was conscious not to see the whole place through a lens and took it all in – I was in awe!

View from the helicopter!

Landing, I felt exhilarated and we wandered around the resort and beaches, finally stopping for lunch, it was very fast food in a canteen style but it did the job.

Mike wanted to explore the island more on foot, which is almost impossible pushing a wheelchair.  So I set up camp on the beach, with my MP3 player a bucket of suncream and plenty of water – such a hard life, whilst Mike went off camera in hand – of course!

One of Mike's shots

Later when the boy had returned with some excellent photos of the wildlife and manmade coral reefs made out of sunken ships, we decided to go for a few drinks as sunset was approaching, we got a table covered it in beers whilst we chatted and took in the stunning views, it was all very romantic!

About 6:30pm it was time to feed the dolphins. We made our way to the pier that was designated as a meeting point and already the dolphins were swimming close to shore ready for their supper!

Because of the wheelchair I was transferred to a beach chair (looks like a wheelchair but with huge quad bike wheels). At the waters’ edge I stood up and we walked into the sea, which was beautifully warm, with both Mike and our assistant holding me up, as the slightest wave knocks me over.

I met a dolphin called Tinkerbell, who was gentle and playful, our assistant had said she was unusually calm and probably sensed my weakness – bless her heart!       

We watched 70 or so other families do the same from the pier, so that we could see all the dolphins from above a splendid sight.

Morton Island had been the best day of the whole holiday, with two more items ticked off my bucket list; a helicopter ride and feeding dolphins – amazing!

Thank you Mike – I know how lucky I am!

L x