Wednesday, 19 October 2016

Stairlift to Heaven

After ALOT of money, phone calls, e-mails, 12 weeks and a company I will NOT be recommending, I got my stairlift!

Like many other mobility and disability aids, stairlifts are seen as clinical, ugly and are associated with the elderly. I myself agree with the first two points but many of us are far from elderly and need this equipment to muddle through our daily lives. 

video
My stairlift joy dance!

So if you’re considering a stairlift, there is no shame or giving in and here’s a modern girls guide to 
stairlifts.

1. Do your research - We did a lot of research into brands, products, and companies associated with stairlifts and still came up a cropper with an uncaring and rude company who didn’t do what they were paid to do. If I was installing a new TV or fridge I wouldn’t have been so angry but this equipment was giving me my freedom!

2. Bags – My right hand controls the stairlift and my left hand is a tad useless, so I have cloth bags both upstairs and down. You pile in all the stuff you need to take up with you that prevents dropping everything and creating a waterfall of crap you can’t pick up, this also works with washing, before I used the bags, I had to hug the dirty clothes and no one needs Mike’s rancid socks so close to their nose!

3. Invest in a lidded coffee cup or flask – I love my morning Dulce’ Gusto skinny cappuccino but my study is upstairs, balancing a hot drink whist controlling the stairlift was fun but nobody has time for a soggy burnt lap.

Safe Coffee

4. Enjoy the ride – There is a law that the lifts cannot go any faster than 4mph and it takes almost two minutes to get upstairs (if you forget anything that’s a 5-minute round trip!) I started to get annoyed that my 2yr old Nephew Alex could overtake me but then I had a thought....

I’m notoriously stubborn. On my good days (which are getting further apart – Gee thanks British weather!) I like to get stuff done and of course, overdo it, so now I see my 2 minute ride on the world’s slowest roller coaster as a time to rest and think about what’s next!

5. Pimp your ride – Yes stairlifts are ugly as sin! You can’t do much with the rails but I plan on learning to use a sewing machine to cover the beige seat in something funky and less drab.

6. Not just for mobility – Stairlifts are, in my eyes, not just for mobility, I fully expect that friends, family or even future teenagers of my own, will get very drunk and I reckon we’ll end up sending them up on the lift to bed plus there’s a seat belt for safety!

My stairlift also has a 125kg weight limit so if Mike and I need something heavy moved upstairs I fully intend to use it to save Mike’s back.

7. Answers nature's call – An unexpected bonus to the stairlifts speed is that you'll achieve very good pelvic floor muscles, because if you’re dying for a pee, you’re not going anywhere fast, so either go before you're desperate or get very good at holding it in!

8. Lastly appreciate the technology – When I was a teenager my parents couldn’t afford a stairlift and the waiting list for a government funded one was huge, so I had to pee in a commode (emptied by my wonderful mum), have a sponge bath in the dining room (also emptied by my patient mother) which is also where I slept for several years, and having the savings to buy my own stair lift when I needed one is a true and brilliant luxury that I’m grateful for.

Until next Wednesday!

L xxx

video
Video Credit to my Brother Steve who remixed my stairlift video to our mutually loved soundtrack of Blink 182



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